Lord, undo me (9/15/11)

I don’t really worship these day

I don’t really stand up to praise you with songs

Or prayers or actions

or with anything

I am full of all the right moves

I am full of all the right words

I am full of all the right religion

But it is all just illusion

I am really

Lonely

Lost

Calloused

Jaded

Cynical

Too religious

Too realistic

and well really just to lazy

to worship you anymore

I have lost my first love

I have lost the joy of your presence

But most of all I have lost the fear of your glory

Papa God I need to see you again

Like Isaiah I want to stand in awe of your glory

To fall down at your feet

To come face to face with your

Perfection,

Radiance,

Goodness,

Holiness,

Awesomeness

I want to stand before you and see you for who you are

and me for who I am

I want to be undone

I want to know me for who I really am

I want to see the depths of my heart

And know that you are the only way

You are the only truth

You are the only life

I want to see me and understand

What it really must have taken for you to

Love me

Care for me

See me

Speak to me

Want me

Communicate with me

Die for me

Die for me

Die for me

Lord, I want to stand in that place where all I can see is your glory

And my sin

Because in that place I can’t help but worship you.

Lord let me come undone

Undo my heart

Lord, undo my heart

break down these walls that I love so much

No, wait don’t,

I’m scared I don’t know if I can handle this

don’t

But I can’t live this way anymore

I can’t stand here in this half-life

this going through the motions life

this not really alive life

Father, I need you so come and in and do what you must

Cut out the tumor on my heart

Break down the walls that I love

Lord let me come undone

Undo my heart

let me worship you again

-author unknown